Parker Gun Collectors Association Forums

I mentioned earlier in this thread that I had a Parker smallbore coming. So now I want to share more info for some laughs.

I'll start by saying that Toolman is a very good friend and he knows I’m going to post this. He has a good sense of humor - and we often joke with each other and friends on SxS gun dealings good & bad. Tool got this started when he pulled a real spoof on me about 4 years ago; he emailed to ask what I thought a ratty 12 gauge/32 inch/straight grip AE Fox was worth (he knows I like 32 inchers and sg guns). He went on, that a gent at his skeet club had it, and Tool had an elaborate story how he was trying to mooch up to the guy. I hit it, hook line & sinker. We went back and forth, and he kept asking questions for tech info and advice. I offered to buy the gun if he passed. He wrote later that he got the AE but wasn't sure it was a good deal, maybe he'd flip it? Then when we were both at Pintail Point for the Vintage Cup, he handed me the case with the ratty AE, which turned out to be Jos Kautzky’s personal XE Grade/32-inch Fox. Tool had let all the other Fox guys in on it and he’d scammed me big time.

This has gone on and on since then with each of us trying to spoof each other on guns we see or hear about. So when I got a heads up on a nice smallbore Parker from a good friend and real gentleman, I had to really put it to Mr. Toolman. First I told him it was a CHE 28 bore, and of course he didn’t believe me. So I fed out more line and bait for a few days but still wouldn’t tell him what it was.

Here’s a transcript of our texts over the last two days when the Parker was getting close (gun is a very nice VH 20-bore/28-incher). I’ve cleaned up some of the language, and deleted some stuff about other things, and I hope you enjoy reading these txts …..

Frank: “so the Parker smallbore finally made it to the sorting center in Allentown. Hopefully will be here tomorrow. Got my fingers crossed.”

Tool: “Ok (name of noted gun dealer deleted here) you’ve been roastin’ my chestnuttz for a week … time to lay the cards down … whatcha get??? A GHE straight grip, 20 bore, 28” ???”

Frank: “ Hey remember how I put up with you for 4 weeks or so before the DGJ came …. on that Averill parker you were keeping close to your chest? And that was 4 weeks before I knew who Averill was. You got 3 weeks to go buddy.”

Tool: “Haaaaaaa….. I forgot about that one….gotta admit that was an epic smoke screen!!!!!!”

Frank: “Nope not a GHE 20 straight grip. But it is a 20 bore.”

Tool: “OK ….. I’ll wait for pics resting next to a PA oven stuffer part deux”

Frank: “Just got confirmation it’s on the truck. Cyl & modified. NY grouse season still open for 4 weeks.”

Tool: - no reply

Frank: “Aahhh…..light snow falling and barely rustling the frozen leaves, a little patter and then the thunder of a brown rocket. You catch a glimpse, russet and black, and then swing on the bird. Just a little daylight ahead and touch off the blue Peters with its crack of lightning. The sharp bark of the gun and there’s some tiny feathers afloating. A wisp of smoke curls from the muzzle as you cradle the bird and think of those long ago days with the Parker Brothers’ finest.”

Tool: “You’re one twisted dude.”

Frank: “Look who’s talking. Hahaha”

Frank: “unpacking now. Woohoo!”

Tool: “Ok GB EVANS… wtf is it…Spillers VHE??? Come on now!!!”

Frank – waits ½ hour without texting.

Tool: “Send Proof-of-Life cell phone photo or all bets are off as this could be another scam!!”

Frank – sends cell phone pic but deliberately not a close up

Tool: “What is it?? VHE?? Damascus? Can’t tell from pics. Come on now.... Looks nice !!!!

Tool: “Congrats”

So, how do you spell touché ?

:rotf: :rotf: